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Funny true dating stories

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There was one with a steak that had a grayish/purple glisten to it, and another with spaghetti and garlic sprinkled on Wonder Bread. He insisted we do shots, and he wasn't much of a conversationalist, so I figured it was a pretty good idea.We're going shot for shot when all of a sudden he gets this weird expression on his face.We went to see a movie, but by the time we left the theater to grab a drink, the mood felt a little off.It got even weirder when my date mentioned that he'd also been out on a date with my roommate's friend…who is a guy.I said, "Definitely not." A few minutes later he dropped something on the floor, and while retrieving it tried to put the toes of my crossed legs in his mouth. I met a guy on Ok Cupid, and we hit it off pretty well.After we hung out a few times, he came over to my place with a bottle of wine and a movie. We'd been on a few dates, but it was the first time I'd seen his apartment.

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Things were going well until he said, 'I'm from Staten Island..don't pump our fists, we pump our chests.' And then he squeezed his pecs." —Kate N."My friend set me up with a guy who was really into improv.We head to a really nice steakhouse, and after appetizers and his third martini, he starts to speak baby talk to me, as in "Would you wike a wittle kissy-wissy?" Our steaks arrive and he reached across the table to cut my meat for me!In one scene, he even wanted me to pretend to be his mom. —Elizabeth L." title="" src="data:image/gif;base64, R0l GODlh AQABAIAAAAAAAP///y H5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" data-src="https://hips.hearstapps.com/cos.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/14/25/539fa21073e39_-_cos-03-blind-date-mdn.jpg?resize=480:*" /"My roommate set me up with her friend, who I thought was cute.Every time I tried to steer the conversation towards his interests or some kind of mutual ground, he would come out with questions like "So what's your favorite show on MTV?" and "So how about that Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman? I was bored to tears and couldn't wait to get out of there.I later found out he also had a makeshift washing machine in his bathtub.I guess it was cool, but I felt like I was going out with that little inventor kid, Data, from The Goonies." "I'd been on two dates with this guy when he started telling me how much he wanted to make me dinner on our third date. Well, the whole next week he sent me pictures of all the meals he'd prepared for himself. I nearly got diarrhea just from looking at the pics. I feel bad, but I was just worried I'd get stuck all the way out in his neighborhood without a bottle of Imodium A-D." "I got puked on. It was this dude, Lorenzo, who was a real tough guy from Queens.He had tools and screws and pieces of wood lying around everywhere. The next morning at 5 am, I woke up with a bright light shining in my face.It turns out he had rigged up this system with a light on a timer to simulate the rising of the sun.